tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5417535823506217209.post6424455504462090829..comments2023-10-29T04:29:29.607-07:00Comments on Pieces of Me: The X-FilesP.O.M.http://www.blogger.com/profile/16410533843419723414noreply@blogger.comBlogger40125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5417535823506217209.post-62994794167410838212009-03-07T09:37:00.000-08:002009-03-07T09:37:00.000-08:00Ah, late to the party as usual. Stumbled into thi...Ah, late to the party as usual. Stumbled into this interesting (and entertaining) post through a string of other like-minded bloggers.<BR/><BR/>Well, firstly, this post and the related relationship insights you provide should be put into a little booklet with a small looped rope attached, so guys could wear it around their necks and reference it anytime they feel as though they're doing something dumb on a date or with their girlfriends.<BR/><BR/>Secondly, and more to the point of this particular question you raise, the level or even existence of a post relationship friendship is in direct correlation to the depth (or height) of emotional saturation during the relationship. If true love is involved, then an ensuing friendship is nearly impossible. If it's casual dating and you like the person sort of how you like a particular toothbrush (I like the soft bristles with the flexible rubber thing on the neck), then the transition to friend status is an option.<BR/><BR/>Personally, I have never made that transition to friendship. To me it's like having a 911 Porsche Turbo parked in the driveway and you've lost the keys. Or, it's like a rusty, oil leaking, bald tire pick up in the driveway that you never want to see again but it won't start, so you can't get rid of it.<BR/><BR/>Essentially, there are too many people in the world to suffer through hanging on to a failed relationship in any capacity.<BR/>-FootfeathersLocal Mind Mediahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06676782580566794924noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5417535823506217209.post-62098970485068144042009-02-22T18:09:00.000-08:002009-02-22T18:09:00.000-08:00Loved this post. I'm nosy so I love hearing these ...Loved this post. I'm nosy so I love hearing these kinds of stories :D<BR/><BR/>I think it can go either way. One of my ex's is probably one of my best friends (though we started out as best friends before we started dating too), but I refuse to speak with 2 of my other ex's and the other ex is someone I do my best to avoid. Need to just find a GOOD guy to date next time...<BR/><BR/>look forward to hearing more of your dating escapades :)Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18285850895862247408noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5417535823506217209.post-10250376674091686962009-02-22T08:41:00.000-08:002009-02-22T08:41:00.000-08:00Hmmm, be "friends" with a serious ex long enough t...Hmmm, be "friends" with a serious ex long enough to collect the money he owes you. Almost took mine to small claims court, and now I just don't really care one way or another what he's doing (he was a Matt!). Being as close as you are with C might hinder that whole "moving on" thing...<BR/><BR/>I'm pleased that I'm getting ready to move to a city I love for myself instead of one I hate for him. If he travels the 1600+ miles after I'm settled I'd probably let him buy me a beer, though. :)Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02861580194582437663noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5417535823506217209.post-41086975722404405332009-02-22T07:48:00.000-08:002009-02-22T07:48:00.000-08:00It's hard to stay friends with someone who tells y...It's hard to stay friends with someone who tells you it would be cheaper to kill you than to divorce you.....<BR/>So, no, I'd say I'm not friends with my ex-husband.....the Bag Ladyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17434610508260994331noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5417535823506217209.post-80141770968110383822009-02-22T07:07:00.000-08:002009-02-22T07:07:00.000-08:00I've got a mixed bag, friends with some, not with ...I've got a mixed bag, friends with some, not with others. But I gotta say, given your history with the Capitan, do you REALLY and truly expect to get over him when you're seeing him all the time? Your track record with him would suggest otherwise, you know? This isn't meant to be mean, but it would seem that you don't want to get over him even though you logically know that you should.<BR/><BR/>Anyhoo, just my 2 cents.EandBhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10086316998962893295noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5417535823506217209.post-40386490856880063902009-02-21T13:35:00.000-08:002009-02-21T13:35:00.000-08:00friends but has always been to my disadvantage:(friends but has always been to my disadvantage:(BOBBI McCORMICKhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00031574796623990139noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5417535823506217209.post-23880731960937475862009-02-20T16:01:00.000-08:002009-02-20T16:01:00.000-08:00If you break up with him, possible but no recommen...If you break up with him, possible but no recommended. <BR/><BR/>If he broke up with you EXCREMENT! <BR/><BR/>Or...my final offer is to not speak for at least 6 months so you can REALLY get over it. Then see. <BR/><BR/>Where are my drinks? Where were the boys? argCharmainehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17949679256019432906noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5417535823506217209.post-6181555775389067042009-02-20T12:53:00.000-08:002009-02-20T12:53:00.000-08:00I'm only friends with one of my ex's but I haven't...I'm only friends with one of my ex's but I haven't had that many. I think it can be done BUT there has to a "grace" period. This story is rather long and probably best suited for email. Be on the lookout.Alisahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04468073781328699944noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5417535823506217209.post-32434454487955186092009-02-20T10:02:00.000-08:002009-02-20T10:02:00.000-08:00My super bad habit is to stay GREAT friends with t...My super bad habit is to stay GREAT friends with the exs that break up with me until I have a mental break down - just kidding. But I just never want them to know how much they matter to me, so I just stay friends. Eventually, we move on and stop talking - but it takes years. <BR/><BR/>The ones I break up with - I never talk to again!Sarahhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10275774127260010827noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5417535823506217209.post-4991080420608571342009-02-20T07:26:00.000-08:002009-02-20T07:26:00.000-08:00I have a couple of exes that I am friends with. No...I have a couple of exes that I am friends with. None of them have spent the weekend at my house, but we get together and chat from time to time.<BR/><BR/>What is it about dating guys with the same name? I think I've dated about 5 Brads.<BR/><BR/>Anyhow, I did have an on-again / off-again ex when I was in my late 20's. He owned the gym, and my second job was aerobics instructor. At the time, I could not imagine us NOT being friends, similar to you and the Captain. We both loved each other, but wanted different things and knew that it wasn't going to work out over the long haul. <BR/><BR/>Finally, I had to start going to a different gym. Neither one of us was willing to move on while we were seeing each other all the time. It hurt more and more each time we got together and broke up again.. This year will be 10 years since I first met that guy, and I don't know if I could be his friend to this day. I think when the feelings are that strong, it takes more time to be able to be "just friends".<BR/><BR/>Sorry for the B & N. You struck a sensitive subject for me. I've been thinking about this a lot lately.Tammyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03861810180918719686noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5417535823506217209.post-22965245576789210322009-02-19T20:22:00.000-08:002009-02-19T20:22:00.000-08:00OK, first, you threw a drink in a guys face at a b...OK, first, you threw a drink in a guys face at a bar?!?!? I thought that only happened in movies! You are such a sassy-pants!<BR/><BR/>Second, I love how you ended the post like Carrie Bradshaw..:)<BR/><BR/>I am not friends with any of my exes simply because I moved far, far away from all of them. LOL. It makes things a lot easier. :)Laurelhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08623841732966475396noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5417535823506217209.post-82559946277714356902009-02-19T19:41:00.000-08:002009-02-19T19:41:00.000-08:00I'm still friends with quite a few ex's. There ar...I'm still friends with quite a few ex's. There are times I wonder why (like seriously, who really should talk to an ex-fiance that walked 2 months prior to the wedding?) but I don't really have problems with them until the jealousy card is thrown. Then all bets are off, thanks for viewing, carry on ;-). <BR/><BR/>I hope he becomes lactose intolerant because he so doesn't deserve you ;-). Hell, even I'd make babies with you (not really, but it's the point).chiahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08894616877610664580noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5417535823506217209.post-17534791495923365382009-02-19T19:17:00.000-08:002009-02-19T19:17:00.000-08:00It depends upon what kind of relationship you had ...It depends upon what kind of relationship you had with your ex. X1 was an on again, off again boyf for 3 years, not a good relationship. Finally, got out of it and didn't talk to him for 2 1/2 years. Then we started talking again and we are friends now. <BR/><BR/>X2 and I were going to get married. But we realized that we didn't want the same things, so we broke up. He started dating someone immediately, got engaged 5 months later and is now married. And he was lying about it to me. So yeah, we don't talk and I don't think I could ever have a friendship with him. Well, maybe in 10 years.<BR/><BR/>But if being friends with your ex prevents you from moving on, then I say, just cut the cord. Hard in the beginning, but gets easier in time.Mariehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03703590936528876653noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5417535823506217209.post-20308832891517043182009-02-19T18:44:00.000-08:002009-02-19T18:44:00.000-08:00I'm only friends with one of my ex's. We still IM ...I'm only friends with one of my ex's. We still IM from time to time to catch up and see how life is doing. We broke up because we were going to colleges in different states though, so it's not like there was some big drama involved. Otherwise I think it's really hard to stay friends with an ex, especially right away.Jess https://www.blogger.com/profile/04319493454447862771noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5417535823506217209.post-7968278136625793202009-02-19T17:20:00.000-08:002009-02-19T17:20:00.000-08:00***rolling eyes***leave the captain alone and find...***rolling eyes***<BR/><BR/>leave the captain alone and find another guy to bring ice cream to.Judihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17659061902462311046noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5417535823506217209.post-38438620150000610872009-02-19T16:05:00.000-08:002009-02-19T16:05:00.000-08:00In my experience, its never too cool to be friends...In my experience, its never too cool to be friends with ex!!! To much history and memories....<BR/><BR/>But thats just me!!!!<BR/><BR/>If you want to facebook friend me, you know my name??? <BR/><BR/>Let me know if you want to!!!Michellehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13012277904032798697noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5417535823506217209.post-47816196974361067022009-02-19T14:34:00.000-08:002009-02-19T14:34:00.000-08:00I think friends with ex's is tricky but who the he...I think friends with ex's is tricky but who the hell am I?! seriously<BR/>I loved the grass is greener on the other side post. I always have to remind myself of that sometimes. You manure list sounds heavenly....Vivhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01275505112098052230noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5417535823506217209.post-31097020478042736912009-02-19T14:16:00.000-08:002009-02-19T14:16:00.000-08:00I'm not friends with a single one of my ex's. Whi...I'm not friends with a single one of my ex's. Which I'm pretty sure is a poor reflection of me instead of them. Whatever, I own it. :o)X-Country2https://www.blogger.com/profile/01543524827265377886noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5417535823506217209.post-46062599648965204672009-02-19T14:14:00.000-08:002009-02-19T14:14:00.000-08:00I tried to be friends with my exes for a long time...I tried to be friends with my exes for a long time. For awhile, I thought I was really accomplishing something.<BR/><BR/>It wasn't until I started dating my now-husband that I started to see how unhealthy it was. Two years and some change later, I am not in regular contact with any of them - even those I considered close friends before. <BR/><BR/>I guess my conclusion is that if you are single, and these friendships are enriching your quality of life - go for it! But there will likely come a time when they will cease to be beneficial, and will likely fade to the background. Hopefully it's a smooth transition.Mrs. Hibithttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17403878397151785001noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5417535823506217209.post-47133882322621956842009-02-19T13:29:00.000-08:002009-02-19T13:29:00.000-08:00excrement. i dont hate any of my exs or anything ...excrement. i dont hate any of my exs or anything like that, but they just don't have a place in my life anymore. i dont need another guy friend, i have brothers and a husband. there's always going to be some sort of underlying romantic tension. if there wasn't you wouldn't have dated, right?<BR/> i dont know, just my retarded opinion.SHMhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06998285814351618666noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5417535823506217209.post-56360679671126936422009-02-19T13:18:00.000-08:002009-02-19T13:18:00.000-08:00Of the really meaningful boyfriends, I'm still fri...Of the really meaningful boyfriends, I'm still friends with one. The others = meh. I talked to one about 6 years ago and he basically told me to never call him again. I thought we were friends -- guess not. I've found that I just can't be friends with guys after I date them. There are a few on FB that I'm "friends" with, and I wish them well, but only ONE who really meant something to me I remain in contact with.Heatherhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12013504768642605916noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5417535823506217209.post-84642597183019838152009-02-19T13:00:00.000-08:002009-02-19T13:00:00.000-08:00First boyfriend - still friends with, but when we ...First boyfriend - still friends with, but when we are both single...the lines inevitably get blurry.<BR/><BR/>Second boyfriend (but would consider 1st serious) - broke up, never heard from him ever again. Not even through other people. Have no idea what he's up to or where he lives.<BR/><BR/>Third boyfriend (2nd serious) - recent breakup and I'm having a hard time being 'just friends.' I may opt out of that altogether.<BR/><BR/>I loved your recap! We'll definitely need to hear about Matt 1 and Matt 3!!!Marathon Maritzahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00617226310522206108noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5417535823506217209.post-80799762554739431162009-02-19T12:36:00.000-08:002009-02-19T12:36:00.000-08:00I think with long term ex's it's not really possib...I think with long term ex's it's not really possible, especially if it ended with feelings still on one side or the other. <BR/><BR/>But I do have alot of guys I dated for 2 or 3 months, and never had it go anywhere, who I'm still friends with, and chat with. Hell one is even married (and I went to him wedding!).Katehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15502681882561955975noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5417535823506217209.post-76565720628731671632009-02-19T12:33:00.000-08:002009-02-19T12:33:00.000-08:00I still text, MSN, facebook my Ex quite a bit but ...I still text, MSN, facebook my Ex quite a bit but we never hang out face to face. Eric, my boyfriend now, and I were on and off for the first year of our relationship and we'd try to be friends during the off period but it'd always morph into more. If we ever do break up I'd hope that one day we could become friends again but I think it'd take a while!Amberhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05185652640389232120noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5417535823506217209.post-13604833578974039992009-02-19T12:31:00.000-08:002009-02-19T12:31:00.000-08:00it depends...for some reason the only men I cannot...it depends...for some reason the only men I cannot seem to ever want to let back into my life is x2- we'll call him Jackass because Jack was his name - momma's boy. And the Captain who was my most recent x before my husband. IT's been what? 3 years since the relationship perished? But for some reason he was such a piece of shit that I don't feel he's even worthy of my friendship because damn it I'm an awesome friend.<BR/><BR/><BR/>X1? I am totally in cahoots with him and would hope to attend his wedding when he does marry and bring my husband along and my daughter. He was my college sweetheart and we dated for 6 years.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com