Monday, January 14, 2008

Vicious Cycle

Do you say "Vicious Cycle" or "Vicious Circle?"
I used to fight with my ex about that.
Anyway - here it is. Sunday nights I start thinking about my work week ahead and I get really stressed out. Kinda panicky and anxious. Sometimes it's so bad that I can't sleep and my heart pounds. Anxiety, I guess.
So my cure for anxiety is wine. I'm sure it's not the best way to deal with things, and it is extra calories but at least it helps me sleep.
Well last night The Captain said he doesn't like being around me when I drink. I guess sometimes I pick fights and I'm kinda mean.
So the obvious thing is to just stop drinking, right? Then I won't be able to sleep on Sunday nights.
See - vicious cycle or circle. Whatever.
Anyway - weigh in today: 139 (started at 146) so at least I'm under 140. My goal is 135 by my Half Marathon on Feb 3rd. 3 weeks. I can do it. Especially if I knock it off with the wine.


Ian said...

I usually say vicious circle, but I’d be willing to give a viscous cycle a try.

Shelley said...

You could try tylenol pm or advil pm on Sunday nights - those nock me out.....and once a week isn't an addiction. Wine does taste better though.

Sarah said...

I usually say vicious circle, but they both make sense!

I've always found that when I get into cycles that I'm 'picking on' the bf after a couple drinks, it's usually cuz there's something he's been doing that's making me crazy but I'm too nice or passive aggressive or something to mention it without the 'truth serum'.

Maybe pick a fight without the wine and the it will stop, and the wine won't have to!

Nancy said...

I usually say vicious cycle. Apparently there's more than one way to skin this cat. My ex used to put two or three sayings like this in the same sentence. I swore he wasn't capable of an orginal adult thought.

I agree with Sarah though about the stuff that is bothering me. It adds up and then truth serum (or PMS) make it come flooding out. If you talk about it sooner as the nicer Jess who isn't quite as annoyed, would that help? :D

We usually get more lovey after a couple drinks. I bet he would like that. :D

Tigerlilly said...

ok, quick background... I was an alcoholic from the age of 17 to 24 and my vicious CYCLE was this

When I got off of work I had to drink the stress away...

In the morning I had to drink to get rid of the headache so that I could go to work.

On the weekends I would drink all day because I wasn't at work.

Hmmmmmmm... now that is a problem! LOL

Now the only vicious cycles I see are my two kids...just wait!!!

Laurel said...

Was the fight about vicious cycle vs vicious circle? I say cycle btw.

Nice job on the weight loss missy!

P.O.M. said...

I don't think we really fought. He just said that I was mean.

I say CYCLE.

RunnerGirl said...

Cycle. I get sloppy, weepy, and obnoxious when I drink too much so mean doesn't seem so bad to me!

TNTcoach Ken said...

Wow, that is a cruel series of events (vicious cycle)! Sounds like the Serenity prayer might fit into your life and stop being mean.

Unknown said...

Maybe you could work on solving the work problem and then you won't need the wine :-) Work is lame anyway! haha :-)

P.O.M. said...

Amen Cara. If I could just get married, have a baby and be a stay-at-home mom then that would solve ALL the problems.... ha ha.
One step at a time.

Unknown said...

i just meant another job... although getting rid of a job all together DOES sound much better :-)

P.O.M. said...

Yeah. The Captain tells me that all the time. But have i some sweet perks with this job that I'm not ready to give up yet. Unless I'm giving it up to stay at home :) Which is my dream in life, but probably not gonna happen.

Christine said...

You know the doctor recommends a glass of wine a day to keep your heart healthy. I think you are just staying healthy! (But then again....coca cola company says diet coke is hydrating ...see my blog about that one!) haha. I like to be is good for ya! Jobs are bad! Easy....drink wine...AND quit working!!

Christie said...

Benadryl usually knocks me out. But I usually wake up pretty groggy. It's the best sleep but I hate how long it takes me to wake up the next morning.

Amy said...

Cycle... Actually, both work!

I feel your pain. I've been a part of the Sunday evening anxiety club for many, many years now. I still haven't figured out a way to really deal with it. Exercising on Sunday afternoons really seems to help, as does a late-night conversation with a girlfriend.

Have you always had this Sunday-induced anxiety problem or is it due to a new job?

I'd scale the wine back to one or two glasses, snuggle with the Cap and call it a night! ;)

teacherwoman said...

I get that way when I drink the whiskey. Yikes! Stay away from me!

Now that I don't drink soda.. the hard liquor is far away, unless I feel like taking shots. Bleh.

Nice job on teh weight loss challange thus far! You are fabulous!

katieo said...

Love the new profile pic!

fyi, if you are wanting to drink now because of a stressful job, it won't get any easier down the road if you decided to have kids.

Mrs. Bear said...

I say vicious cycle. I think either would work though.

Congratulations on getting closer to your goal, that is awesome!

I found your blog from Anne's blog (Run DMZ). I will be back!

Laura Lohr : My Beautiful Life

the Bag Lady said...

Way out here in the wilds of Canada we say vicious circle, but hey, we're hicks.
Oh, and the Bag Lady totally agrees about the drinking to help the sleeping. She occasionally has a drink, but if she wants to sleep after that drink, she has to have a LOT to drink. One or two just keeps her awake, adding to the misery she already suffers (hot flashes, leg pain, etc, 'cause she's so f*cking old...) But if she has a LOT to drink, she can sleep (okay, technically it's probably called passing out...) So she generally tries to stay away from drinking now. Sucks to be old.

My Life said...

I say cycle... and I too hate Sunday nights. Just take it all in stride... one mile at a time, one day, hour, minute at a time.

Jess said...

So, I'm pretty late to the discussion, and I don't mean to be a spelling nazi, but "viscous" means something liquid -- sticky, or gooey; and "vicious" means something malicious. So, a "viscous cycle or circle" would be quite different from a "vicious" one.

Sorry for my uptight word usage. It's a disease and I can't help myself. Please still like me.

Lori said...

Cycle. And I know it all too well, just not linked with job stress. Exercise helps me, but doesn't take it completely away. Drugs probably would :P

Mamacita Chilena said...

I say vicious cycle.

I am a big wine fan. I think as long as you compensate for a glass or two here and there with your calories it's ok. I just have to make sure that I drink extra water on days when I drink ,because running dehydrated is NO fun at all.

So good luck if you are going to cut all the alcohol out. And good luck on losing those last couple pounds. You and I are right about at the same spot weight wise.

Heather said...

Ack. This is a tough one and I have several thoughts I'll try to condense so I don't hog the space here.

I'm completely in the same boat; anxiety riddled and always looking for something to soothe, be it cookies or wine. I'm wary of relying on wine (alcoholism runs in my family) and we all know how I feel about the cookies. They have been my blankies in the past. But I've worked (and am working) really hard to just sit with whatever comes up -- anxiety, etc. and put a name on it, and figure out what I can do about it.

I find that a long, long walk really helps (in your case, a run), to clear my head and enables me to get some perspective on the anxiety, so that it's not in the driver's seat. It's always gonna be there, but clearing my head makes it feel less crazy. I also find that writing down what's bothering me/what I can do about it. Anxious thoughts can actually look quite hilarious on paper, and are able to counter that with reality and most importantly, what you can do about them.

Work stuff is hard. When I lived on the East Coast my job was insanely crazy and I alternated between happy hour and hard cardio to get out the crazy. Now I just put in all my pent-up resentment, fears and basic frustration/dissatisfaction into the treadmill.

healthy ashley said...

Look at how much you are down.. that is awesome!